I wanna see what your insides look like; I bet you're not that pretty on the inside

Dear Diary:

Forgive me, I know I have a week without talking to you but I’ve been busy…

A great singer wrote some words that have so much sense to me. Those words told me: "Imagine there’s no Heaven above us, only sky; and no hell below us".

"Imagine all the people living for today, imagine there's no countries, nothing to kill or die for and no religion too".

I imagined all the people living life in peace, with no war, with happiness and beauty. People, who can walk, jump and run… Not people like me… A simple girl that even gods have erased from their memories…

My wheelchair can help me to go to places that otherwise I could not go, but a boy’s heart is not an option.

When you have no friends is very easy to focus on your studies, detect details and analyze people.

I like a pretty boy that’s always in the library meeting girls and taking their notebooks to get to know with them. I think he’s not happy, I believe he started doing that to forget some other girl but now it’s just a hobby.

Everyday after my math class, I go as quickly as possible to arrive to the library to take a ticket, hoping that he will have my number in his hand, waiting for him to steal my notebook and dreaming of someone that would like to spend a night with me… But I never made it…

I know his secret, I have a weapon to destroy him, but I got no one to tell about his dependence to the ticket machine.

Gossip isn’t funny when you’re alone…

However, I had an idea to have a conversation with my charming prince! I followed him to the library to know what ticket he would take, so, the next day I would pick the same ticket number and he would meet me!

I washed my blond hair, wear my greatest clothes and used the perfume Mama gave me for my birthday. Today, my love would see me!

At 13 o’clock, my wheelchair was already in the library and I was holding the ticket #85, the same number he selected yesterday. But he wasn’t there, the library-girl stared at me as if I was blocking the way, then I asked for some copies I didn’t need to make her smile.

I waited for that handsome guy for three hours; it was at 16 o’clock when everybody in the library watched the news in the TV, my secret love was being interviewed by a tall journalist. She asked him about his imprisoned friend, I didn’t know his best friend was in jail. Who would’ve thought that hot guy was a killer!? I wanna see what his insides look like; I bet he's not that pretty on the inside! I never imagined someone could do that to another person! He deserves to be in jail! Poor girl… Why he killed her!?